Standing abandoned on this vast plane.
(What adjectives can describe
a heart that is breaking
from the weight
of its own loneliness? )
I searched.
Shuffling through my
schedule
emotions
relationships
memories
plans
Frantically.
“God where are You?”
Energy spent, I collapsed.
From my knees, face to the ground
The search continued
And I found I’d been looking too hard.
Expecting to find Him on my scale
it wasn't until the balance changed
and face-down, I could see
I hadn’t found Him because there was too much me.
As I considered my surroundings,
The swells and ridges
The firm, scarred ground I knelt on.
I was struck with how inadequate my dimensions were.
Not nearly enough to comprehend His presence.
He had been there.
A giant invisible only because of his great size,
The whole time feeling stranded,
I was searching in the palm of His hand
Only as far as in His very grasp.
Diminish
Melt down,
Re-calibrate
Re-shape
Me
Is there anything great that is not in You?
And he hath made my mouth like a sharp sword;
in the shadow of his hand hath he hid me, and made me a polished shaft;
in his quiver hath he hid me; and said unto me,
thou art my servant, O Israel, in whom I will be glorified.
Then I said, I have laboured in vain, I have spent my strength for nought, and in vain:
yet surely my judgment is with the Lord, and my work with my God.
...Yet shall I be glorious in the eyes of the Lord
and my God shall be my strength.
Isaiah 49:2-5
